It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize
