margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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