there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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