areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
