I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
