My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
