I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
