doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
