i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
