if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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