Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
