i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
