buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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