WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize