No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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