i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
