it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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