I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Randomize
