Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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