awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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