hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize