when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
