sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
