i love accidental penises.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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