Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize