My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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