Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
