he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
