She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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