I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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