I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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