i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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