I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
