just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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