no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
