hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
