it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
