Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
