so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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