I just made out with a guy for $7.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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