Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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