Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
