is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize