love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
