and she was petting her beer can
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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