Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
