I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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