This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
