Midget sex pt 2 tonight
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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