You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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